I am really missing Haley today. It just seems to quiet around the house. I miss hearing her say “I love you, Mom” four hundred times a day. I miss hearing her yelling at the dog as she tries to trap him in her bedroom (he’s a quick lil bugger!). I miss her hugs and cuddles. I even miss fighting with her at bedtime.
When Haley is gone, I am completely unmotivated to do anything. I don’t want to get up and vacuum or clean the tub. I hate even getting out of bed when Paul is working because I know that I am merely rising out of slumber to face the silence of the house.
I am trying like hell to keep myself busy. I have a decorating project underway in Haley’s bedroom. I think she’ll really like it. Paul is even being extra helpful and helped me to pick out some beautiful fabric. He was wandering through Joanne Fabrics holding up all the glittery or rhinestone bedazzled stuff he could find-it was really cute. He says “my girls will never go without” and it melts my heart. I love that man so much! However, I hate that he says our girls will be diva’s. He acts like Haley is already spoiled, and Charlotte will be too. LOL What does he know about diva’s anyways?
I have been trying to get all of Charlotte’s stuff ready too. I think that I should be pretty well prepared by 32 weeks just in case we go early. I went into labor with Haley the first time at 33 weeks, so I definitely want to be ready before then. We got a bunch of hand-me-down clothes from a family member of our sister-in-law. I have to say, I have never gotten such gorgeous hand-me-down clothes! They are all brand name. There is not a single stain on any of them. They are all pristine. It’s amazing. There are enough clothes there that if we didn’t get another piece of clothing we could make due. Of course, it wouldn’t be easy, but doable nonetheless. It’s nice to know that we’re making headway in acquiring baby stuff. I have to wash everything pretty soon. We have to put the crib up this week. I have alot of organizing to do. It’s so hard to fit more stuff in such a tiny apartment. Okay, it’s not tiny, but it’s alot smaller than the space we used to have before moving to Indiana.
We spent this past weekend in Michigan. I stayed with my mother-in-law all weekend and it was nice. I am very lucky. I love my mother-in-law beyond words. We are very close and I wouldn’t have it any other way. She is very excited about the baby and it’s so cute! I had planned all along to have her in the delivery room with us if it’s possible. She asked me about it this weekend, and I thought she knew our plans. She was so overjoyed to hear that I wanted her to be there with us. I guess when my sister-in-law was pregnant last year that she had told MIL that she could not come to the hospital until sometime after the baby was born. MIL, of course, was crushed by that, but the pregnancy turned out to unsuccessful so it became a non-issue. So, this will be MIL’s first real grandchild. Right now there is just Haley and then Paul’s step-sister has a little boy, but they don’t go visit MIL often. I’m proud that I can give her the first real grandbaby and even more proud that I can give her the experience of being present at the birth.
I have noticed that I am now put on some sort of pregnancy pedestal–especially in Paul’s family. His brothers dote on me in a way that I never expected. They are always hugging me and stuff. They hugged me alot before too, but now they are always putting their arms around me and stuff–it’s very cute! They like to tell me all the silly shit they plan on teaching this baby, which they find hilarious–since it’s all stuff that mother’s don’t want their kids to learn. Paul’s brother, Kenny, once taught Haley some stupid dance that my MIL dubbed the “retard dance” because it looks so ridiculous. Kenny is very serious when he says he plans on teaching this kid the same dance. LOL I love that Paul’s brothers have plans to be as much a part of the baby’s life as they are with Haley. Haley’s older and I thought they would just have more fun with her, but they are anxious for the baby too!
Charlotte was quite cooperative for my MIL as well. She nearly kicked on command every time MIL touched my belly. I think in our short weekend there that she felt Charlie kick more than Paul has been able to in the last couple of months! Charlie never kicks for Paul. The minute he lays his hand on my stomach she goes quiet. LOL She likes fucking with him. She’s definitely my daughter!!
1 Comment
July 16, 2008 at 11:18 pm
I need to start washing everything, too. Blech.
Do you talk to Haley every day on the phone? Poor kid. I bet she’s missing you like crazy.